After an idyllic first night with Thea things really went off course on night number two.
Apparently this is totally normal as on the first night your newborn is recovering and therefore is tired and sleeps a lot but on the second night she realises she’s in a whole new world and reacts by screaming the house down and being desperate to be close to her mum.
Consequently Thea, my dream baby, turned into a monster and wailed constantly ALL night. My previous evening’s smugness evaporated as I tried and completely failed to get Thea to sleep or stop crying. She fed and fed and fed. It was all she wanted to do.
And she decided to start this when Chuck had gone home and I was alone (aside from the midwives, support workers and six other mothers on the ward!), trying to get her to settle. She was OK when she was on me but the moment I set her down she went mental. The other mothers on the ward must have HATED us.
The worst thing was she was OK when I let her settle on my breast but the midwives wouldn’t let me sleep like that. I’d been up for 4 days with only a couple of hours sleep since birth. I felt awful, fragile and soooo upset. I just needed to rest but there was no way I could.
One midwife on the night shift was AMAZING! She tried everything she could to help and eventually got me formula to send Thea off – 30ml didn’t work, another 30ml still didn’t work. A further 45ml and this on top of all the colostrum finally got her quieter but she only slept when either on my chest or laud on the bed with me curled around her, my breast awkwardly in her little mouth!
She didn’t want to suckle, she was using me as a human dummy!!!
Dawn came and each grizzly hour passed by with her griping and crying alternately. At 7am the amazing midwife’s shift was up and she gave me a cuddle. I sobbed on her shoulder!
Finally Chuck was allowed in at 10am baring a Starbucks panini. I started crying again!
He was amazing and let me sleep as he held Thea and she finally exhausted herself and fell into a deep sleep.
I must have been out for two hours – when I woke Chuck had been kicked out and Alethea was sleeping peacefully in her crib – the traitor!
The day shift midwife was also lovely and we had a few more glucose checks which were all very good (I’m convinced she only got a low reading cause she was cold!) so she managed to get us discharged so we could go home – although she’d realised pretty early in her shift that I WAS going home that evening no matter what the stupid test said.
I just knew there wasn’t anything wrong with Thea – she ate well, weed a lot, she hadn’t pooed since 3hrs after birth but that was normal. Apart from her epic meltdown during the night she was fine and I felt I would have been able to cope with it better in our home… On the ward just feel so judged!
The midwife from the night shift had actually recommended formula and even a pacifier to me and she stressed that she wouldn’t normally – Thea just wanted some love and comforting.
I let Thea sleep on me at home and if I drop off too it’s no big deal – I have cushions all around me so she can’t slip and I wake with every tiniest mew so I’m confident she’ll be fine.
Plus Chuck is there to check. It’s so much easier with two! I have literally no idea how single mums cope!